by Deborah Stinson
(Port Clinton, OH, USA)
Ambiguity/Tremler
He held my gaze a moment too long
and made it perfectly clear.
He looks outside for entertainment
and I wonder why I look like entertainment
when I haven’t entertained
that thought in months. or years.
Actually I might have thought about it;
just not acted on the thoughts.
Daydreaming is a sin here.
The good women block out those fantasies
with home-cooked meals and heads turned
in the dark when it becomes necessary.
Or so it seems. I wouldn’t know since it’s
been my habit to enjoy it in the past regardless
of what anyone thought.
But now I just don’t care.
Something died and love became a lie
against my truth.
I hide in my own revolution
while books are written on how to lie
intentionally. Ambiguity 101 is the
hot new course on campus.
I see him noticing me, but he’s not serious.
It’s just another exercise.
A game. The same one
we all keep losing.