Can a Cheater Ever Change?
The old saying goes, "Once a cheater, always a cheater!"
Can a cheater ever change?
If the answer was always the same for this question, it would make our decisions a whole lot easier when we are caught in that dreadful situation of determine what to do now that you know your mate is cheating.
When most people get caught cheating they will make promises and vows to never cheat again. They will tell you how much they are sorry and how much they love you.
As long as there is an ounce of you that wants to believe it, your decision has become a difficult one.
What you need to know is that the desire to cheat is a very complicated one. The cheater could really be sorry and have all intentions at the time of apology to change their ways...but can a cheater ever change? Unless they get to the root of why the behavior occurred, chances are the old saying WILL hold true.
Clear communication is going to be the key in order for you to make an informed decision that eventually will be better for both people at the end.
When it comes to infidelity, you will need your mate to come clean so that the true causes of their actions are determined.
Was it too much opportunity?
Was it something specific that is missing in the current relationship?
Was it for the thrill of excitement?
Are they in love with someone else?
Was it strictly alcohol related?
It may be a combination of these. But whatever the case may be, you are the one that needs to be COMPLETELY comfortable with the answers that you get during your clear communication sessions (this needs to be after the fireworks settled and on a civil level).
If you choose to...
After you discover why the cheating occurred, as a couple you will need to focus on the factors that caused it and make changes so that it does not happen again.
If you don’t think the root reasons behind the cheating behavior will change, there is very good chance that you will find yourself in the same scenario down the road and still asking the same question.
Can a cheater ever change?
** You should be so comfortable with your discussions and progress that you are making with your mate...because though it doesn't hold true in all cases.
"You cannot change a tiger's stripes!"
Change IS possible though, but very difficult. You may eventually live happily ever after with a tamed tiger!
It requires a lot of insight, work and effort. And without some type of counseling and a strong commitment to change, people often revert back to the old ways.
My girlfriend is extremely happy (so she says! ) to be living with a tamed tiger..
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