Is Getting a Massage With a Happy Ending Considered Cheating?

by S-
(Toronto)

Is Getting a Massage With a Happy Ending Considered Cheating?

I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now. We were really good friends before we got together. When we were friends, I knew that he and his boys would go to these shady massage parlors that would give them "happy endings".

It was something that I knew about and was quite funny back then. They would tell me how ugly most of these women were and at the time he had no clue that we would ever end up together. Back then I considered these massages harmless.

One thing led to another and we started catching feelings for each other. We eventually got together and things slowly became more serious until we eventually moved in together.

Once he moved in, he really stopped hanging with his friends like he use to. He hardly goes out anymore.

It is clear to him and myself that we are in an exclusive relationship but we never talked about him visiting these massage parlors like he did when he was single.

Well, I recently found out that he had been to one of these places when I busted him because I found semen on his boxers. When I confronted him, he told me that he went to get a massage because he was stressed and the lady "began fondling him" and he didn't stop it.

I know he is full of it because I know that he use to love these places. I have lost complete trust in him and I feel that he never stopped going to these places all along. He says that this was the first time that he had been to one of these places since we have been seriously together.

My questions are:

1. Is getting a massage with a happy ending considered cheating?

2. Is his actions enough to break up with him without even giving him a chance to prove that this was just a mistake given the history of he use to be when we were just friends?

Please I would really like to hear honest opinions based on everything you have heard. If you only have comments such as "leave him!" without giving me your reasons then please do not even bother to comment.

I am so conflicted and I am looking for honest opinions and feedback to help me sort through my emotions.

S-