What to do about son in law's advances

by Cindy
(Houston, TX, USA)

I don't want to tell my husband or my daughter because it would ruin so many lives. But I have to wonder if he comes on to other women as well. Daughter has 2 young children with him and is stay at home mom right now. I am sure she doesn't know that he gave me a long, pelvic grinding hug, or propositioned me once with "no one will know but us", and even after being rejected found an opportunity to rub against my behind when I was bending over to retrieve a pillow for my sleeping grand daughter (HIS daughter)while family was just around the corner. These episodes always happen after drinking, I reject him (quietly so no one will know)and then when we see one another again it's as if it didn't happen. Thought it would go away after rejection, but see a pattern developing. I will admit that it was flattering, but I am also appalled. How can he do this? He and his wife seem to have a good relationship and she would be devastated. He and my husband are great friends, again, how could he do this? I need advise.

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starstarstarstarstar 		Hard To Refuse
by: BrendaSue

It happened to me as a divorced Mom at 44 years. I had been divorced some 4 years when my daughters boyfriend started flirting with me. A good looking guy well built and athletic. My daughter was living with me to save money and had a night nursing job.
I usually enjoyed a glass of wine after dinner and her boyfriend would join me and soon it was two glasses of wine and wine makes me very vulnerable. One night we had several glasses of wine and the boyfriend and I engaged in some kissing and making out, I went to bed and a while later he came in the room and crawled into bed with me. I admit that I did not refuse him. I regretted it the next day but the deed had been done, of course stopping it was not an option now that I had tasted the forbidden fruit.
I can stop now, and seemingly he does not want to as well.
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Dicey situation
by: Anonymous

Thats a tough situation to be in. Honestly i have to give the guy credit for going for it. The drinking excuse is not a bad idea either. And from your own admission you are flattered. It does sound like it would ruin the family if found out about. I have to give the guy credit for going for it though. Plenty of men dont have the balls to try and pull it off.
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		mother in law
by: joshua

I had sex with my mother in law who was hotter than my wife and not a prude. It started when she spent the weekend at our house and my wife was doing errands. I was really horny because of her big ass and when she bent over in the kitchen I came up behind her and let her feel my package. She was so startled at what was happening that by the time she began to resist, I already had her pants down and was at her entrance. Before she knew it she was being pounded and enjoying every minute. It only happened the one time and we thought we would have to confess what happened when she missed her period but luckily she miscarried after 8 weeks.
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Go for it!
by: Anonymous

I'd say work towards going for it with approval by everyone. Or at least tacit approval. You don't have to discuss the blow-by-blow (!) with everyone - just that everyone knows the two of you are alone together in a context where "naughty" would be the presumption.

Problems arise when there's manipulation, bad faith, lies, broken promises and all the rest of it that comes with illicit affairs. My wife says no problem for me to have affairs - but she picks or approves of the girls. I've been too lazy to take her up on it. She handed me $300 on Bourbon Street and said "Do her" to the most attractive stripper there - yikes. Way too much money! If she'd do it for five dollars and no room fee, then why not. With my wife, same thing. We almost tried it once and could have pulled it off if we were committed to it, but we're both too lazy. It would have to be the ideal situation, and not something it took any effort to accomplish or plan out, and be free. So maybe that means it will never happen to either of us.

I've heard of this mother in law fantasy before, so yeah - I don't have it, but if he wants to drill your oil field, why not.
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Go through with it!!!
by: Jill

I faced a similar situation.... My husband fantasized about my mom, a former fashion model who still looked terrific at 47 years old. One day at my mom's house I caught them playing around in her pool.... She had on a skimpy thong bikini and was almost naked.....he had a huge erection..... I Tod them to go ahead and do it.....both thought I was kidding but I wasn't....they had sex in her bedroom and have been seeing each other once a week ever since. I think sharing your husband with your mom has advantages... Give it a try. Jill
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Be Direct
by: Anonymous

Be direct with him and privatly tell him to stop or there will be consequences.
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		From a daughter who is going through this...
by: Anonymous

I recently found out my husband has been pursuing my mom. This started over the internet (while I was pregnant), I found out she was sending him dirty pictures (apparently at his request).

I honestly think your daughter needs to know so that she can either end the relationship or so that they can work on their relationship.

Hearing this will hurt her, but in my case I'm glad I know, because I don't want to be played for a fool by either person.

Also, in my case both parties are guilty (he pursued her, she went along with it, both agreed that I could never find out about it) so it is a little different. I hope you find the answer you need.

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